Make life feel easier: get 7 weekly tips to break old patterns, build better habits, and take empowered action:
Sign up
Empowering YOU to Thrive
In Life or Business
August 1, 2025

Tiny Islands of Calm: Harnessing the Power of Pausing

Introduction

In the last two months, we’ve explored gratitude and glimmers, the art of noticing moments of light that already exist around us. Today, we’re taking that a step further. Instead of simply waiting for those moments to appear, what if you could intentionally create them?

These self-created moments are what I call tiny islands of calm. They are short, intentional pauses that help your nervous system shift out of stress and back into a place where you feel grounded, present, and capable.

Let’s explore why these pauses matter, how they work, and how you can weave them into your everyday life, even if you’re busy, overwhelmed, or sceptical about “mindfulness.”

Why Pausing Matters (Especially for the Nervous System)

We live in a culture that rewards constant motion: faster responses, more tasks, endless notifications. Our nervous systems rarely get a chance to fully settle.

When we stay in this “always on” mode for too long, the body can’t tell the difference between real danger and a full email inbox. Heart rate rises, muscles tense, and breathing becomes shallow. Over time, this chronic activation can lead to exhaustion, irritability, and even physical symptoms.

A pause, even a very short one, isn’t indulgence. It’s biology.
It’s how we signal to our nervous system: You’re safe right now. You can let go.

What Is a “Tiny Island of Calm”?

Think of your day as a long ocean crossing. Some parts are stormy, some are calm, but you’re always moving.

An island of calm is a deliberate stop along the way, a place to rest, even briefly, before you continue.

It might be:

  • A breathing space between finishing one task and starting the next
  • A moment to look up from your phone and notice the sky
  • A pause before reacting in a conversation
  • A slow sip of tea where you actually taste it instead of gulping

These islands are small, but their effect builds. Each one teaches your body that it’s possible to shift from urgency to presence, without waiting for the world around you to change.

The Polyvagal Connection: Why Pausing Works

Polyvagal Theory explains that our nervous system constantly scans for cues of safety or danger. When we’re in “fight or flight,” our sympathetic system dominates. Pausing, especially with intentional breath, soft gaze, or sensory focus, activates the ventral vagal system: the state of safety, connection, and rest.

This isn’t just mental. Physiological shifts occur:

  • Heart rate slows
  • Muscles relax and loosen
  • Digestion improves
  • Thinking becomes clearer

Over time, these tiny islands create a more flexible nervous system. You recover from stress faster and can handle challenges without tipping into overwhelm.

How to Build Tiny Islands of Calm into Your Day

1. Start with Micro-Pauses (10–20 seconds)

You don’t need a meditation cushion or a quiet room. Try:

  • Taking one deep breath before you answer your phone
  • Placing your hand on your chest and feeling one breath in and out
  • Closing your eyes for a count of three before replying to an email
2. Anchor Them to Existing Habits

Pair a pause with something you already do:

  • Every time you drink your tea or coffee, take three slow breaths before the first sip
  • Each time you stop at a red light, unclench your jaw and shoulders
  • After finishing a task, look away from the screen and notice five things around you
3. Use Your Senses to Ground You

Your senses are a fast track to regulation. Try:

  • Listening for the farthest sound you can hear
  • Feeling the texture of your clothing or the floor under your feet
  • Letting your eyes rest on something comforting: a plant, a photo, a patch of light
4. Pause Before Reacting

When emotions rise, pausing can prevent automatic reactions you might regret. You might silently count to five, take one full breath, or even step away. That pause creates choice.

5. Create “Glimmer Spaces”

Combine what you learned about glimmers: make your pause in a place or with an object that naturally feels good, near a window, holding a warm mug, or sitting outside for 30 seconds.

“But I Don’t Have Time to Pause.”

If you’re thinking, I can’t slow down, I have too much to do, remember: a pause doesn’t need to be long.

You can do this in less than 30 seconds. And paradoxically, taking those micro-moments often makes you more focused and efficient afterward.

Think of it like hitting “save” on a document: a tiny action that prevents bigger problems later.

What If Pausing Feels Uncomfortable?

For some people, especially those with a history of trauma, slowing down can feel unsafe at first. Silence might feel uneasy. Stillness might trigger restlessness or even anxiety.

If that’s the case:

  • Start very small: Try just one breath
  • Keep your eyes open: Focus on something external (like the view from a window)
  • Pair the pause with movement: Stretch your arms, roll your shoulders, or walk slowly
  • Seek support: A trauma trainedtherapist can help make these pauses feel safer

Combining Glimmers + Pauses

A lovely next step is to combine what we’ve learned so far:

  1. Gratitude: Recognise what’s good
  2. Glimmers: Notice unexpected moments of light.
  3. Pauses: Create your own moments of calm

Together, they form a simple but powerful nervous system toolkit. You’re not just waiting for life to get easier, you’re actively shaping how you experience it.

A Simple 1-Minute “Island” Practice

Try this right now:

  1. Put your feet flat on the floor
  2. Exhale fully
  3. Take a slow breath in through your nose
  4. Notice one thing you can see, one thing you can hear, and one thing you can feel
  5. Let your shoulders drop
  6. Smile softly (even just a tiny one)

That’s it. You’ve just given your body a safe, regulating pause.

Closing Thoughts

Life rarely gives us long stretches of peace on its own. But we don’t have to wait for perfect conditions. We can create tiny islands of calm right in the middle of ordinary days—pauses that remind us:

“I am here. I am safe. I can soften, even for a moment.”

Over time, those moments add up. They make the storms easier to navigate and the good day

Havenings Technique Certified Practitioner Sue WoodriffeMeta-consciousness with Sue WoodriffeEFTi Accredited-Advanced-Practitioner-SealEFT Matrix reImprinting Sue WoodriffeAdvanced BLAST Logo_2018Sue Woodriffe - Core Transformation mono
Please note I am not a medical doctor and cannot diagnose physical or mental health conditions. Neither can I prescribe or advise on medication.
Website maintenance by 
onebrightspark
Top closearrow-circle-o-downfacebook-squareellipsis-vinstagram