We’ve all heard about the power of positive affirmations—statements like “I am successful”, “I am confident” and of course that old chestnut “I am healthy, wealthy and wise”. The idea is simply to repeat a positive belief enough times, that our minds will start to accept it as truth. But for many people, affirmations don’t feel true, and instead of creating change, they create internal resistance.
This resistance is often called a "tail-ender"—that little whisper (or even a shout), “No, you’re not.” If you say, “I am wealthy,” but deep down you feel financially insecure, your mind might respond with doubt: “That’s not true. I’m struggling just to pay my bills.” Instead of reinforcing confidence, affirmations can sometimes reinforce the very self-doubt we are trying to overcome.
How best can we shift our mindset in a way that feels more natural and inviting?
Enter the power of “What if?” questions.
The phrase “What if?” is a gentle nudge to the unconscious rather than a forced command. It opens up possibilities rather than demanding belief in something that feels out of reach. Unlike affirmations, which can trigger resistance, “What if?” creates a space for curiosity, allowing new thoughts to emerge without the pressure of immediately accepting them as truth.
Consider these two approaches:
The second approach invites exploration instead of resistance. It doesn’t demand that you believe something you don’t yet feel is true. Instead, it encourages you to consider a new perspective without triggering self-doubt.
Our brains are wired to seek answers to questions. When we ask ourselves “What if?” in a way that opens doors rather than closing them, our minds naturally begin searching for supporting evidence. This is based on a concept in cognitive psychology called the confirmation bias—the tendency to look for information that supports our existing beliefs.
By asking empowering “What if?” questions, we gently guide our minds to focus on positive possibilities rather than reinforcing negative assumptions. Over time, this shifts our thought patterns and creates new neural pathways that support a healthier mindset.
Here are a few ways you can begin using “What if?” questions in your daily life to create meaningful change:
Instead of: “What if I fail?”
Try: “What if this experience teaches me something valuable?”
Instead of: “What if I embarrass myself?”
Try: “What if people appreciate my effort?”
Fear-based “What if?” questions keep us stuck in worst-case scenarios. Shifting them toward curiosity helps us break free from limiting beliefs and see opportunities instead of obstacles.
Instead of: “What if I’m not good enough?”
Try: “What if I’m more capable than I realize?”
Instead of: “What if no one likes me?”
Try: “What if the right people appreciate me for who I truly am?”
Self-doubt thrives on negative assumptions. By gently questioning those assumptions with curiosity, we weaken their hold over us.
Instead of: “What if I never achieve my goals?”
Try: “What if every step I take brings me closer to success?”
Instead of: “What if I make the wrong decision?”
Try: “What if I learn something valuable no matter what I choose?”
Success is often built on small mindset shifts that accumulate over time. When we allow ourselves to consider positive possibilities, we create momentum toward change.
Unlike rigid affirmations that can backfire by triggering resistance, “What if?” questions work with the natural way our minds process information. They gently invite us to entertain new perspectives without the pressure of immediate belief. Over time, this creates a ripple effect—changing not just our thoughts, but our emotions, behaviours, and ultimately, our lives.
So, what if you started using “What if?” today? What new possibilities might open up for you?
One of the best (in my opinion) “What if?” questions I have come across and use frequently myself, that seems to apply to many negative thoughts, is “What if it all works out?”. I’ve even got that written on a post it note by my bed!
Give it a try, and let me know what you notice what changes for you?
